This thread has phone's

[Fabulous]

ITT:


It was a bleak midsummer afternoon in De'vale Minisota, and the year was 1942. Conrad Smith, a suspected communist by his neigbors, was taking his usual walk through the city park at around 4:36pm. He stoped to say hello to the local children, and proceded home. On the way however, he was pulled into a back alley, and beaten for several hours. He was brought to some kind of warehouse and tied to a chair, with a large light blaring in his face. An unknown entity asked him questions about Coordinates and "artifacts". They eventualy untied him, and left, satisfied he knew nothing. He lay on the floor for what felt like hours, before finishing his walk home. It wasn't dark out and he suddenly realized that he was back at the alley. He looked around to see that the building he had been taken to was nowhere to be found. He also noticed that his bruises were gone, and that he was no longer tired. The time on his watch said 4:35pm. Returning home he pondered on his situation, what had happend and what it was that these people were searching for. When he arrived home there was a phone sitting on his doorstep. It rang. On the other a man was telling him something. He replied "It looks shoped, I can tell by the pixels and having seen alot of shoops in my time." Having no idea what he had just said or heard he proceded to bed. The next morning he was married to Hitler. The married couple had several pictures taken of them over many years. One day Hitler declared "WHO WAS PHONE" and then he was jewish.

There were no survivors

and

Prominently displayed in the children's section of the Houston Downtown Public Library, among several others of the same title, My First Cookbook appears as a run-of-the-mill children's cookbook, complete with large print, simple instructions, colorful, friendly illustrations and a somewhat disproportionate desert section. In fact, the only major deviation from this theme is an article near the end of the book entitled "A Recipe for Success". This is a complex, macabre ritual involving human sacrifice, self mutilation and sacrilege, as well as more curious and innocuous practices such as walking down a stair case with a prime number of stairs taking them two at a time and then up it taking them three at a time. It's written in the same cheerfully simple prose as the rest of the book but WHO WAS PHONE